As surprising as it may seem, even the queen of fries can get her heart broken every once in a while. In times like these, she allows herself to sink into solitude, but of course still can’t pull away from her beloved blog. Okay, I’m gonna stop referring to myself in third person, because, well it’s weird.
First of all, congratulations! If you’re reading this, it means you’ve managed to not delay the inevitable. It means you’ve stood up for something. You took a stand and said ‘Enough is enough!’ And God knows it wasn’t easy. Heck, it’s probably one of the hardest things you’ve had to do.
I’m here to tell you that the hardest part – breaking up – is over, so you can breathe a little. But it doesn’t get easier right away. In fact, the first week will probably be tough on you. So I’ve put together a guide to help you get through the first 7 days after your break-up.
Monday:: The Morning After
You wake up and you’re about to check your phone for any messages from Him. As you reach for your phone, you suddenly remember you broke up with him last night! Was it a dream, you think to yourself. No, you recall the conversation and remember you definitely broke up. It seemed like the right thing to do at that moment, but why do you feel like shit now?
It’s normal to have doubts the next day after a break-up. After a night’s sleep, you wake up and all that anger is gone. All that’s left is a question mark, wondering if you did the right thing. Here’s where you must remind yourself of the reason you broke up with him in the first place. If it wasn’t so bad, it wouldn’t have pushed you to break up, right? So keep that thought with you and don’t let it slip away. You’re going to need it to get through the week.
Tuesday:: The Realization
Yesterday you were still shocked and likely to be in denial. You made it through the day because you managed to shut out all your thoughts & emotions.
But today is when it will hit you. You’ll get through the day with a trance-like state. Everything is hazy and blurry, and you don’t feel like doing anything. You might even be tempted to call in sick and stay in bed. Do that, if you want. It’s okay to wallow and cry. You won’t feel like talking to anyone yet. Which is okay too.
Today is a good day to get rid of things that will remind you of Him. Photos. Stuffed animals. Cards. Flowers. Anything that makes you think of Him. If you can’t bear to throw them out yet, that’s fine. Stuff them in a box or keep them hidden somewhere.
Wednesday:: The Temptation
After two days of not talking to Him, today you will most definitely feel like calling Him.
Now, before you do that. Take a minute to think about what you will achieve by calling him. You will tell him you miss him, he’ll say he misses you too. And then what? He will talk you into reconsidering your decision, which will leave you more confused than ever. Play that scenario in your head, and you should be able to get rid of the urge to call him.
If that doesn’t work and you’re still tempted to call him, my remedy would be to revert to anger. Okay, so anger is not the healthiest emotion in the world, but for this purpose, anger is recommended. Plus, it’s healthier to be angry, than to be in an unhealthy relationship, isn’t it?
It’s midweek, and you only have a few more days to get through the worst week of your life. Take a deep breath. You will be just fine.
Thursday:: The Depression
Today, all of a sudden, you may feel extremely sad. You have gone through almost a whole week and there’s no one to share it with. Life is boring and depressing and you just don’t want to go on alone anymore.
Well, guess what, you’re NOT alone! You have family and friends who love you and care for you. Give them a call. Go out for dinner. Talk to them. I promise you will feel like a weight has been lifted.
Friday:: The Reflection
You’ll be glad to know that today you’ll feel a whole lot better, because it’s Friday! You will feel a bit nervous about spending a Friday night without Him, but also a little excited to be spending the night YOUR way.
I wouldn’t recommend going out drinking as yet, because getting drunk could probably lead you to calling Him, or hooking up with another guy. And both of these scenarios won’t end well.
So, why not have a night-in instead. Watch a movie or read a book. Order some extra large fries with it. It’s going to be a relaxing peaceful night, just you & your couch.
Your thoughts will go back to Him from time to time, but you won’t feel sad anymore. You won’t feel angry anymore too. You will reflect upon your decision and know that it was the right thing to do.
Saturday:: The Pampering
Being in a relationship means your weekends are usually spent together. But now you have a whole Saturday to yourself with no interruptions, and this thought excites you more than anything.
Set out to making the day about YOU. Pamper yourself. Schedule a spa & massage session, manicure & pedicure, and get your hair done.
Then take yourself to a nice restaurant, order your favorite dish with a glass of wine.
Do you hear that? The sound of solitude. It’s not that bad, is it? Your body is relaxed, and so is your mind. And in this moment, you will actually feel good about yourself and your decision. You feel content about where you are in life, and the fact is you don’t need a man to share every moment with. You love your freedom and you are excited about where your life will take you next.
Sunday:: The Strength
Today you will wake up feeling much better. It’s hard to believe only six days has gone by, when it feels like forever. You look back at yourself six days ago, and realize you’re not that sad lonely girl anymore. Today you are strong. Today you know you can get through anything. And you know you’re going to be absolutely fine.
You call your family & friends again, to thank them for being here, and to let them know you’re going to be okay. You feel appreciative for having them in your life, and more importantly, you know that you are the bestest friend you will ever have, and you appreciate yourself even more.
Congratulations, you have made it through 7 days of hell. It’s only going to get better from here, with a little faith and a lot of fries 🙂
Fries and men! So cute… and true. Breakups are hard, but if you come out better on the other side, its worth it! It adds to the person you are, the person you’re becoming!
That’s so true 🙂 thank you for dropping by and commenting 🙂
Haha I love everything about this! So true 🙂
Thank you 🙂
I love this! Amazing advice. And fries really are the cure for mostly everything 😀
I’m glad to hear & thanks for stopping by ! 🙂
Love it! Great post, well written.
*Suitable alternatives to fries: pretzels. Yes, pretzels are yummy. I like pretzels. A lot. Hmmm, pretzels. Nom. Now I’m hungry. Does anyone have pretzels?
I think this is very well said, I didn’t have this experience until six months after when my best friend, or well ex, decided to move on and find a new gf. It hit me like a pile of bricks, but I did exactly what you said above. And it’s working out, kinda scared to get in any kind of contact with him though cause it might just bring the feelings back. We’d dated for about seven years.
Anyway, haha, getting too into my personal life which you can just end up reading on my blog. But, what you’ve written is fabulous, very casual, yet personal and enlightening. Great job!
I’m glad you got through it and like I said, it only gets better from here… So hang in there 🙂
I not only “like” this post, I have book marked it in my web-browser. Did you write this post for *me*? lol
My breakup has been intolerably painful. I don’t know which “day” I’m on, in this first week after the breakup, but I woke up today believing it will all pass, like everything else in life. So much emotion was invested into this nearly-two-year-post-divorce-love-affair…. but there’s no time like now to move on.
thank you, thank you, thank you for your awesome blog and a tremendous message that resonates well with me.
Life is good.
I’m so glad this post helps you in your journey… And I’m even happier to know that you’re in a good place now.. It gets tough sometimes but like you say, life is good 🙂 thank you so much for taking the time to leave such a heartfelt comment, I’m truly honored 🙂
Thank you for checking out my blog. I’m glad you did because it gave me a chance to discover yours and it’s pretty damn awesome. This particular post is absolutely fabulous. Personally, I’m in the middle or beginning stages or, I really don’t even know what this–of divorce. It sucks majorly. All I can do is thank PTSD for turning my world upside down o.O.
I can completely relate and all I can tell you now is that it WILL get better.. I know that sounds like a cliche but it is true.. You just need time to heal and you will jibe just fine 🙂 thank you so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment… Means a lot to me 🙂
I think He and I have always caved in after Day 1 or even Day 2. It’s hard to know what “meant to be” really means when sometimes you can’t live with the person and mostly you can’t live without… ay ay ay.
I know what you mean… 🙂 thanks for reading and commenting!
There’s not much a large plate of fries (or chips as they are in UK ;)) won’t fix!
Absolutely ! I’m craving some chips right about now 🙂
Thnxx a lot …have been through a breakup …thnxx a lott …evnthough i didn’t like the guy ..but it sure does hurt …:-)
I’m glad you found it helpful and you will be absolutely fine in no time.. trust me 🙂
Thank you. This is so well written and fun to read… of course helpful and empowering. I will take the advice.
Thank you so much for your kind words 🙂