Rule #1 here
Rule #2 here
3) Draw the line
Okay, so you’ve stepped out of denial and decided that you will indulge in some fries, without asking about the calories. Good for you.
But does this mean you should run off to McDonalds and munch down six orders of fries? I should hope not. Which is why it’s important to draw the line.
There comes a time in life, where you have to draw a line in the sand and say, ‘This is where I stand’
In every relationship, it’s important to set boundaries, and it’s no different when you’re in a casual relationship.
Drawing the line means asking yourself:
1) Where do I stand?
2) How far am I willing to go?
3) What am I okay with?
4) What am I not willing to accept?
To put it in context,
My line is when the guy I’m casually dating says he has a girlfriend but wants to continue seeing me – that’s a game-changer. Sorry, Olivia Pope, I adore you and I hope you end up with Fitz, but I’m not willing to be someone’s side-chick.
My line is also when I realize I want more out of this than just a limited time fun. That’s actually a red flag because it means I’m starting to fall for this guy. When this happens, I see three ways it can go :
1) He doesn’t feel the same way, and I get out of it.
2) He feels the same way, and the casual relationship turns into a more intense one.
3) He doesn’t feel the same way, but continues to string me along. I like him enough so I stay. And it ends up destroying me.
Because I’ve been through all of those 3 things, I can safely say that I allowed #3 to happen because I had not drawn a line.
Which brings me back to the importance of having boundaries.
Ask yourself where you draw the line, and then draw it.
Rule #4 here
Rule #5 here